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VIRGO (Aug 23 - Sept 22)
	Learn something new today, like how to spell or how to count to
	ten without using your fingers.  Be careful dressing this
	morning.  You may be hit by a car later in the day and you
	wouldn't want to be taken to the doctor's office in some of
	that old underwear you own.

Nuclear war would mean abolition of most comforts, and disruption of
normal routines, for children and adults alike.
		-- Willard F. Libby, "You *Can* Survive Atomic Attack"

A large number of installed systems work by fiat.  That is, they work
by being declared to work.
		-- Anatol Holt

Given the choice between accomplishing something and just lying
around, I'd rather lie around.  No contest.
		-- Eric Clapton

It is against the law for a monster to enter the corporate limits of
Urbana, Illinois.

Come, let us hasten to a higher plane,
Where dyads tread the fairy fields of Venn,
Their indices bedecked from one to _n,
Commingled in an endless Markov chain!
		-- Stanislaw Lem, "Cyberiad"

His mind is like a steel trap -- full of mice.
		-- Foghorn Leghorn

Congratulations!  You have purchased an extremely fine device that
would give you thousands of years of trouble-free service, except that
you undoubtedly will destroy it via some typical bonehead consumer
maneuver.  Which is why we ask you to PLEASE FOR GOD'S SAKE READ THIS
OWNER'S MANUAL CAREFULLY BEFORE YOU UNPACK THE DEVICE.  YOU ALREADY
UNPACKED IT, DIDN'T YOU?  YOU UNPACKED IT AND PLUGGED IT IN AND TURNED
IT ON AND FIDDLED WITH THE KNOBS, AND NOW YOUR CHILD, THE SAME CHILD
WHO ONCE SHOVED A POLISH SAUSAGE INTO YOUR VIDEOCASSETTE RECORDER AND
SET IT ON "FAST FORWARD", THIS CHILD ALSO IS FIDDLING WITH THE KNOBS,
RIGHT?  AND YOU'RE JUST NOW STARTING TO READ THE INSTRUCTIONS,
RIGHT???  WE MIGHT AS WELL JUST BREAK THESE DEVICES RIGHT AT THE
FACTORY BEFORE WE SHIP THEM OUT, YOU KNOW THAT?
		-- Dave Barry, "Read This First!"


Another page of fortunes...

Saturday, 25 July 2026   Michael J. Chappell   Contact me at: mcsuper5@freeshell.org Made with Emacs