______ __
/ ____/___ _____/ /___ ______ ___
/ /_ / __ \/ ___/ __/ / / / __ \/ _ \
/ __/ / /_/ / / / /_/ /_/ / / / / __/
/_/ \____/_/ \__/\__,_/_/ /_/\___/
Q: How many journalists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Three. One to report it as an inspired government program to bring
light to the people, one to report it as a diabolical government
plot to deprive the poor of darkness, and one to win a Pulitzer
prize for reporting that Electric Company hired a lightbulb
assassin to break the bulb in the first place.
Renning's Maxim:
Man is the highest animal. Man does the classifying.
Gordon's first law:
If a research project is not worth doing, it is not worth doing
well.
Did you know ...
That no-one ever reads these things?
Mother is the invention of necessity.
What the world *really* needs is a good Automatic Bicycle Sharpener.
The last time somebody said, "I find I can write much better with a
word processor," I replied, "They used to say the same thing about
drugs."
-- Roy Blount, Jr.
REPORTER: Senator, are you for or against the MX missile system?
SENATOR: Bob, the MX missile system reminds me of an old saying that
the country folk in my state like to say. It goes like this: "You can
carry a pig for six miles, but if you set it down it might run away."
I have no idea why the country folk say this. Maybe there's some kind
of chemical pollutant in their drinking water. That is why I pledge to
do all that I can to protect the environment of this great nation of
ours, and put prayer back in the schools, where it belongs. What we
need is jobs, not empty promises. I realize I'm risking my political
career by being so outspoken on a sensitive issue such as the MX, but
that's just the kind of straight-talking honest person I am, and I
can't help it.
-- Dave Barry, "On Presidential Politics"
Saturday, 20 June 2026 Michael J. Chappell Contact me at:
mcsuper5@freeshell.org
