______ __
/ ____/___ _____/ /___ ______ ___
/ /_ / __ \/ ___/ __/ / / / __ \/ _ \
/ __/ / /_/ / / / /_/ /_/ / / / / __/
/_/ \____/_/ \__/\__,_/_/ /_/\___/
It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood
Boulevard at one time.
In the olden days in England, you could be hung for stealing a sheep or
a loaf of bread. However, if a sheep stole a loaf of bread and gave it
to you, you would only be tried for receiving, a crime punishable by
forty lashes with the cat or the dog, whichever was handy. If you
stole a dog and were caught, you were punished with twelve rabbit
punches, although it was hard to find rabbits big enough or strong
enough to punch you.
-- Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"
I appreciate the fact that this draft was done in haste, but some of
the sentences that you are sending out in the world to do your work for
you are loitering in taverns or asleep beside the highway.
-- Dr. Dwight Van de Vate, Professor of Philosophy,
University of Tennessee at Knoxville
Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles,
called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you
have been drinking. Electrons travel at the speed of light, which in
most American homes is 110 volts per hour. This is very fast. In the
time it has taken you to read this sentence so far, an electron could
have traveled all the way from San Francisco to Hackensack, New Jersey,
although God alone knows why it would want to.
The five main kinds of electricity are alternating current,
direct current, lightning, static, and European. Most American homes
have alternating current, which means that the electricity goes in one
direction for a while, then goes in the other direction. This prevents
harmful electron buildup in the wires.
-- Dave Barry, "The Taming of the Screw"
Distress, n.:
A disease incurred by exposure to the prosperity of a friend.
-- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
If you want to understand your government, don't begin by reading the
Constitution. It conveys precious little of the flavor of today's
statecraft. Instead, read selected portions of the Washington
telephone directory containing listings for all the organizations with
titles beginning with the word "National".
-- George Will
It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so
ingenious.
fortune: CPU time/usefulness ratio too high -- core dumped.
Saturday, 20 June 2026 Michael J. Chappell Contact me at:
mcsuper5@freeshell.org
